WHY DOES IT FEEL THAT IT'S NOT FUN ANY LONGER

Had a wake up call last couple of weeks ago.
Actually to me it's quite right if you called it a wake up call.
It's just that a had an interview with someone, who is a bit sarcastic.
And her words just made me remember things that I don't want to remember.

For example, why I chose to do a thing?
When I answered a for the reason, she would say something degrading, or blaming me, for my choice.
Maybe from her point of view, that I should've been better than what I am.
But, it was just her way of saying that made me feel so stupid.
And thanks to that, though I don't want to admit it to myself, I became so depressed.
Also just like she did to me; blaming for myself that I should've been better.
Thus lingered the question: It should've been like this, I could've been like that, my situation is most probably way better than now.

The result: I started losing my grip, things weren't enjoyable as before, I felt so tired I just wanted to shut my brain down, I didn't want to think at all, I felt like a robot; I did everything as usual but I felt empty inside.
Whether I like it or not, that bit*h had successfully affected me!
Thanks bit*h!

I am so grateful that I don't have to work together, though I hate of losing the opportunities, greater than what I have now (not just the money, you know).

Oh well, c'est la vie